Romance Sold Separately—Batteries Not Included

Swipe left on fairy tales and lean into this beautifully detached disasterpiece. “Available Side Piece: Romantically Distant” is for the emotionally elusive, the flirtatiously flaky, and the heartbreakers who ghost with grace. With punchy yellows, rebellious reds, and splatter effects that say “I text back... eventually”, this design is basically your relationship status in bold, unapologetic type.

The story behind it? Picture a meet-cute that ended in “meh.” After one too many confusing coffee dates and declarations of “I’m not looking for anything serious,” someone decided to make it official—their vibe, that is. No false hopes here, just hourly rates, icy charm, and clear boundaries. It's the romantic equivalent of a fire exit: necessary, clearly labeled, and only used when things get too intense. And that signature Winkatchoo wink? It’s the cherry on top of this commitment-free sundae. Romance might be distant, but this design hits close to home for anyone who's ever loved with Wi-Fi strength: occasionally, and only when connected.